Sunday, April 28, 2013

Track is Ruining My Life (but We Are Still in Love)

I'd just like to take some time today to blog about a topic very dear to my heart: track. If you don't run, you'll have no idea what I'm talking about. I suggest immediately logging off of the internet, putting on a pair of sneakers, and jogging off into the distance like the motivated human being I know you can become. 

For all of you who actually do run, or were just too lazy to take my suggestion and go offline, this is for you. 


I originally joined cross country as a freshman in high school because the team was 180 people strong and it was the only co-ed sport, thus making it a wonderful social opportunity. It turned out to be the most amazing thing I've ever joined, and that is on a list including Pinterest and the middle school student council. Seriously, check out my Pinterest sometime. Not to brag or anything, but I have 4 whole followers. I'm kind of a big deal. 


Anyways. Back to track. After joining cross country, I promptly fell in love with running, and we have been unhappily together ever since. Joining the cross country team inevitably led to me joining the track team, where I became a sprinter in order to avoid ever having to do mile repeats again. Track isn't one of those "fun sports" you hear people talking about; you know, the ones people watch? Football, soccer, volleyball, pingpong... Track is more of one of those mental torture sports for anyone not associated with the team that is forced to attend an entire 7-hour meet. It's also a very individual sport where you strive to improve your own times and then race against others to see who can run in circles the fastest. 


At this point, you're probably thinking I couldn't have possibly made track sound any more fun. But wait, it gets better! Our practices typically consist of running to a crowded track, where we are subjected to warming up with humiliating drills including "clap skips" and "zombie walks" in front of all present. We then commence the workout, which usually includes sprinting as fast as you can around the track, receiving your time and a skeptical eyebrow raise from the coach, and then jogging back to the start. This exercise is repeated several times until we can't feel our legs and our lungs are basically on fire. After that, we jog (walk) back to the gym where we meet our coaches, who drove back in their car, and stretch together. The one really lovely thing about being a sprinter as opposed to a distance runner is that our practices are usually much easier and we almost never have to do ab workouts afterwards. Ha!


During almost every practice, I find myself wondering why I put myself through it. Why don't I just quit track and join badminton? I often think to myself. But then I remember that badminton is not a real sport and I'm also very uncoordinated at any sport involving a ball. Which is basically all of them. 


For those of you who are still hanging in there during this long rant-y post, I salute you. Ten points to Gryffindor! I'm also assuming a lot of people checked out already, so to them I just say this: 

And no, Mr. Rogers did not get arrested for being a pedophile. That was Barney. Get your facts straight. 

Another thing about track is that it monopolizes your social life. After spending two hours at practice, then having to go home and finish your insane school workload, your social life during the week will consist of sadly staring at Facebook photos of people having more fun than you. Friday nights usually consist of someone calling you to hang out and you saying, "Sorry, I'm actually at a track meet!" and then hopefully adding to the dial tone, "Some other time maybe...?" 

After all this, why do I do track? Why do any of us? It's not because we have a deep passion for running in circles. It's because track is awesome. 

No matter where I look, I could never find a better group of people than these. Even if you're not super close, everyone on the track team is like a super cool family that you get to spend every afternoon with. That's the best kind of family, because you only really have to see them for two hours a day and they mostly don't know where you live. At track I think you become really close to people you would probably otherwise never even talk to. And even though running is basically an individual sport, I've never seen that much teammate support anywhere. I think it's because your individual performance doesn't affect how they do so they just want you to be happy. Not like soccer, where I bet everyone secretly bullies the goalie when they let in a shot. That's the ugly side of soccer that the cameras don't want you to know about. A goalie probably experiences way worse stress-related hair loss than any other group of athletes combined. Except maybe ballerinas, I don't even know what they do. 

Additionally, if you run track, you've got the best body. Also, running clothes are basically the most comfortable clothes on the planet. I suggest wearing some. If all that isn't enough for you, track is incredibly cheap compared to most sports (all you need is a pair of shoes) and requires no special training. You just kind of go for it. All runners exude and aura of happiness after running, also known as a runners high, which is caused by an endorphin rush to your brain. Endorphins are one of the hormones produced that make you happy. The other one is seratonin, which is found in dark chocolate. Runners can eat as much chocolate as they want because they work out. Think about it. 

So consider running as a thing. Even if right now you just want to walk around the block a few times, a little goes a long way! RUN FOREST RUN! If he can do it so can you! And if you're in school, join the track or cross country team. It'll be the best thing you ever do for yourself besides home facials. But we'll save that for another time.

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