ATTENTION!

I would like to take a few moments today to appreciate perhaps the best holiday in the world: Mother's Day. Yes, my unsuspecting readers, this is a Mother's Day post. Deal with it. Along with Father's Day (which is coming up shortly!) Mother's Day is one of the two best holidays EVER. My mom is actually the coolest person in the world! Truly. This week she braided my hair into a headband. 7 girls asked me how I did it. That's right, my mom can do the best hair ever. She can also cook the best pies on both sides of the Mississippi, teach middle school demons, paint flawless portraits, and even handle a high school sleepover that spills into Mother's day (heh-heh). She is amazing. I love my mom, and I'm sure you love yours too! That's why today, I challenge you to appreciate your mother as much as possible. Here's a few things you could do to show her how much you care:

1. Mow the lawn
2. Make cinnamon rolls
3. Write a heart-felt card
4. Walk the dog
5. Walk the cat
6. Walk the hamster
7. Make soup!
8. Get a tattoo of her name on your back (in calligraphy lettering)
9. Run a marathon topless so everyone can see your kickin' tattoo
10. Bake three different varieties of cupcakes
11. Give her a foot massage
12. Take her to a salon for a pedicure to remedy your bad foot massage...
13. Breakfast in bed!
14. Lunch in bed!
15. Dinner in bed!
16. New sheets for the food stained bed
17. Paint her nails
18. Send her flowers
19. If you're a girl: Don't wear a halter/crop/tube top, booty shorts, mini shorts, or shoes with a heel exceeding 1 inch
20. If you're a boy: Button your shirt so I cannot see your belly button. Wear a tie!
21. Text her small compliments over the course of the day
22. Tell her you love her

  If you're still reading this post, then get off your butt! You should be off frolicking in meadows appreciating your mothers! Oh, and please, someone do numbers 8 and 9.